dread going back to work after hols.. esp when the break is not long not short.. not long enough for ur work to b delegated to other ppl.. yet its long enough for work to b accumulated.. argh.. somemore all come with deadlines at around the same time.. !!

i did something stupid tdy.. this morn i ate cake for breakfast.. my mum mumbled abt putting it in cover.. den she emptied the rice cooker.. i tout she meant putting it in rice cooker n found it weird.. but i tout mayb put in the normal food cover will have ants.. so i PUT the cake in the rice cooker n closed the cover.. din tout too much of it until i came home n my mum said they had a treasure hunt for the cake.. haha. come to think of it.. i oso duno wat made me put it there.. so stupid.. mayb woke up in the morning too blur..

the year is ending in less than 1 week.. so fast 1 yr over again.. think this yr is not a bad yr.. experienced mani new things.. mani firsts this yr.. things like buying my first camera, winning a mp3 in a lucky draw for the first time etc etc.. thinking of wat new yr resolution to make.. most prob wont b making any.. haha

did my appraisal wif manager tdy.. had to say it quite got on my nerves.. initially she said my technical knowledge is not bad n im an independent worker.. no issues wif work performance.. but later she say i almost fall into the bottom 10% cos the managers think im too quiet n dun think my work performance is on par.. there is a rating system for each dept where all the managers will rate each employee to determine the amt of bonus they get.. so its categorised as best, better, gd or no gd.. obviously i almost fall into the no-gd category even though im now at the bottom of the gd category..

this rating system is obviously bullshit since the managers duno everybody's performance except their own team members.. those who r on gd terms wif the managers will not be referred to the lowest category.. she asked me to b more visible on the dept level.. as if i so free go n toke to all the managers when i dun even have things to toke to them.. n if the rating system is managed by them den it wont b surprising if all the managers nominate themselves into the top category.. wat a contradiction.. say my work knowledge gd but den overall performance bottom 10% cos im too quiet.. wats the point of working hard den.. might as well spend my time socialising n sucking up to the right ppl

den she say sometimes she duno my work status so its hard to track my work load.. i have oredi cc my team lead in every email i sent n she knows it.. duno y she still say hard to track.. when there r no status updates its obvious tat i dun have any work to report.. go n report i no work den ask to b arrowed is it.. n every big thing small thing oso must report.. at first commend me on my independence.. now say everything muz report as if i have to be so dependent on other ppl like tat

she oso say i can b more visible by volunteering myself for one of the 2 roles which she is thinking of creating.. i call it sai kang experts.. which is to b an expert on SK which everybody cant even b bothered to go n chup n u have to pass the SK knowledge to them.. like baby feed them like tat.. this is call eat until too free go n ask for more work to do.. she said managers wont remember the gd things u have done.. they oni remember the bad things.. so its ur task to make sure ur credits r highlighted in the appraisal.. if tats the case den y bother to do new things when theres a risk of me doing it badly.. i might as well err on the safe side n dun make ani mistakes.. aniway if its a gd job its only expected of me..

after saying so much, she asked me to think of some ways to improve on visibility for nxt yr.. i can think of a few more do-able action items other than volunteering for the SK expert:

1. attend conference calls at my desk wif the speaker on at full blast so tat ppl around me can know my work updates

2. go for frequent tours n bring back local delicacies.. send out mass email to the whole dept so tat i will b more visible.. can stuff their mouths full oso n bribe them so as not to nominate me into the bottom category

3. shout across to teammates sitting at different cubes without walking over so tat the managers can hear me.. like wat one guy is doing now.. always calling "mr lee! mr lee!" across the partition .. so irritating

4. cc every piece of shit to them regardless of big or small so that they will know my work status.. mayb cc to the whole team oso to say hey im working u noe..

5. do nothing. after all there will b new ppl joining in nxt yr.. hopefully they will b the scapegoats for the bottom category since they r new n not much visibility.. den i will remain safe in the gd category since they oredi occupy up the space

out of all these ideas i think the 5th one is the best.. haha

i passed my exams.. hoho.. n i got surprisingly high marks for essay.. nvr even get tat high marks for take-home assignments.. if i wrote tat kind of content for my gp i would have failed long ago.. but seems like they mainly interested in the grammar n not the content.. so even though i wrote boring n repetitive content but as long as i use different grammars correctly can liao.. haha.. sad to say, high marks in exams is not equivalent to the ability to converse in real life.. -__-

grammar/vocab: 84/100
listening: 48/50
dictation: 42/50
writing: 42/50
oral: 35/50 (tongue-tied even though qns were given b4hand.. -__-)
essay: 46/50
total: 297/350

the title refers literally to a smelly potato.. at the same time it oso refers to my cursing of the potato.. haa. this smelly potato of the veggie rice is v potent.. so potent tat it caused me to up vomit down diarrhoea.. but i still stupidly finished it up cos i tout its juz the seasoning tat causes the weird taste.. stupid move

officially 1 yr older.. the stupid pig had to rub it in by saying she tout im 25.. @#$@#$.. so lack of sincerity.. say she will b the last to wish me happi bdae since she cant b the first.. end up she slept even earlier than me.. nxt yr no present for u! hmph

thanks to all the well-wishers.. though somehow all either intentionally or unintentionally chose to msg me at evening.. made me thought my hp either spoilt or i shld do some reflection on myself for being so forgettable.. esp the a-bit-too-considerate cousin who chose to msg at nite cos dun want to disturb me.. nxt yr dun b so considerate hor.. want to date me juz ask hor.. even if i busy i will give u premium slot one.. at least give me a chance to feel v impt mah.. nxt yr ur bdae i msg u as soon as i wake up n jio u out.. let u have a feel of wats it like to feel impt.. haa

one fren msg me even though she touring in thailand.. so touched.. though i wonder if i will b charged extra for the reply msgs.. hee.. juz realised i forgot to make 3 wishes.. argh.. wasted..

i think the 2kg i gained is becoming permanent.. T.T.. when i told my sis abt this, the unsympathetic pig said "eat lah eat lah".. -__-.. well at least she din say "pui 死你".. T.T

met my uni fren yest.. she gave me a box of facial masks.. haa. practical gift.. i like. but i hope it doesnt imply anithing else :( .. den she treated me to korean dinner.. the rice cake sucks.. chew until feel like vomitting.. yet she said its nice cos it tastes like 年糕... ???.. nxt time eat korean food muz remember not to order rice cake n cold noodles.. both eat until feel like puking.. chew until no taste still hard to swallow

was walking around orchard when i told my fren its v hard to buy clothes nowadays.. she said the clothes around here quite nice.. den she showed me a few stores.. but den the clothes inside all look so.. err... not my type.. tried one top but its too loose.. i wonder wats wrong wif the clothes.. or is it my proportion? its always the top too loose n bottom too tight.. or mayb im fat at the wrong places.. :'(

bumped into my jc fren.. took me a few secs b4 i realise tat the "passerby" who tapped my hand was no ordinary passerby.. she told me shes going to teach in jan.. another teacher-to-be.. teach maths n physics somemore.. i told her tats the exact combination i was given b4 the interview oso.. den she said if i want i can sign up for interview again cos they oni want to c ur interest in teaching.. i said no thanks.. in fact im v grateful for their rejection.. haa. dun c the joy in teaching..

walked along orchard road to find the bus stop.. saw tat the xmas decorations r all up.. looked v glittery.. so i took a few pics..

giant xmas tree

i think the xmas tree is the oni thing wif the xmas "feel".. the rest of the lights all look so deepavali.. or is it juz me? hmm..

this one still ok

looks like deepavali rite?